Coping with Mental Illness at University Part 1: Dealing with Stress and Homesickness

Hello people!

Today I'm going to be covering the topic of University which is a widely worrying thing to everyone, let alone people with mental health issues, who are perhaps used to being looked after by their parents, friends, or doctors they know and have known for a long time. The concept of going off to a place where you could get ill and there would be nobody there to look after you is very scary, particularly if you're not down with the self care movement.

 It can be very daunting, and it scared me for a while, but when it came to the last few months, I became very excited, thrilled even, to get away from the place I had felt trapped in all my secondary school years. The only thing keeping me there was my family, my dog, and my education, and after me and my ex boyfriend of nearly 4 years broke up in the summer, a change of scene seemed like a fabulous idea. 

Most of the reason I was so excited to go to uni was because I had made friends there already via Facebook, as most universities now have group chats, and you can find out who your flat mates, are  which I found insanely helpful! I was also excited because for the first time in my life I was studying my favourite subject, in a pretty cool place, Leeds College of Music. Moving to Leeds felt like a dream, and I honestly thought I would be more anxious moving away from home.
I realise now that the change of seen probably did me good, but I was also changing medication at the time, which could have affected the way I saw things. 

Anyway, enough about me!


How to cope with Mental Illness at University : Dealing with Stress and Homesickness




Decorate your room

Decorating your room is one of the most enjoyable things ever, and although it can be stressful if you're a perfectionist, it's also a way to make your room feel more like home. Pick out your favourite colour for a duvet, decorate with fairy lights, pictures of back home and postcards from your favourite places. Making your room a safe space can really help when you're stressed out and need somewhere to relax. 



Socialise

Even if it's just participating in one of your uni's freshers events, socialising is good for the soul, and if you're anxious in social situations like me, people will understand! Everyone is trying to make friends and everyone is friendly, and walking into that room and thinking everyone already likes you is the key to confidence apparently. 
Finding a University group chat is also a good way to make friends if you'd rather make them online than in person. I found this so calming as there were familiar faces, and I was able to develop friendships in advance, giving me assurance that I could socialise without fear! Friends are good to have when you're stressed and homesick, as distractions and also just for a hug!



Keep in contact

At first, I was so wrapped up in Uni life that I barely communicated back home, and most of my friends didn't either because 1) they were having so much fun 2) they were scared if they called they'd feel homesick.
Personally, I adore face-timing my family now, I want to keep up with all the gossip without having to take a 5 hour trip home. It tides me over until the next time I get to give my mum a big cuddle and play with my dog. Face timing pets is also very amusing if you have them, and is a fabulous party trick (At least I thought it was until my friends decided my dog looked so funny and was like a folded towel because she is so wrinkly)
Parents are are not only there to listen to all your stories about what a fab time you're having, but also there so you can bitch about your uni work and people at uni who are stressing you out. Feel free to exaggerate all you want. Stephanie IS a cow for not inviting you to her flat party, and your tutor IS the worst person in the world for giving you 67 hours of homework all due for tomorrow. Your parents will not know otherwise. Maybe leave out some details though, apart from important things you need to tell your parents - like if you're struggling with your condition. 


Relaxation

Schedule in relaxation time. Trust me, it's a life saver.
I have an amazing app called Calm, some of the meditations and sleep stories are free (loads of good ones are free) but you can pay a subscription to get more meditations and mindfulness exercises! I swear by relaxation and mindfulness, even if its before you're about to go to sleep, it helps the mind relax and your body to unwind. Find things you enjoy that aren't going out and drinking, and don't go out purely because you feel you have to. Going out is fun, but its not the only thing you have to do at Uni. I joined a Yoga class at my college which was fabulous, and I met some friendly faces while relaxing! Do it, You'll thank me later.


Sign up to your local GP

This is a must for all students, but especially for if you have a mental health condition. You do not want to be waiting in A and E or a walk in in a crisis because you can't get a Doctors appointment. Most student places allow a 24 hour sign up period, sign up and 24 hours later you can get an appointment. My practice has walk in from 8:00am, which means you can walk in and get an appointment on the day, and see a doctor.
It's very important that your doctor is aware of your condition and you book appointments at least every month, maybe more so if you're on medication. Don't make the mistake I made, and wait until the day you need your medication to go to the doctors. I have missed the walk in appointment many times because of not realising I had ran out of medication. Count your medication, and see when you run out, and book an appointment before that date. Makes it less stressful and more organised that way. Don't stop taking your medication without telling your doctor and withdrawing slowly. It can really affect you and make you feel in a bad way. Always take your recommended dose and try to avoid heavy drinking, and don't drink all together if you've been told it can have serious affects.


Go to Student Services


Student services are a god send, and most will advertise during freshers. You can apply for a DSA (Disabled Students Allowance) for most mental health conditions, and get support there too. They have many services, counselling, talking to tutors and telling them about your needs, and some even help you organise work if you're stressed. It's definitely a good thing to go to them, as it's so much easier having your teachers know about your needs, and making them understand that you may need extra time because of your illness, or if you miss a lecture they will be more understanding and help you catch up. 



Feeling stressed/upset/depressed/anxious/suicidal?

Samaritans
Offering emotional support 24 hours a day
Tel: 116 123
Sane Line
Offering specialist mental health emotional support 6-11pm everyday.
You can also email through their website.
Tel: 0845 767 8000
You can also find services and groups in your specific area by using this link:

There should be posters/ leaflets in student services and around Uni of lines you can call if its too late to go to the doctors and you need to talk to someone. 
Remember, If you feel suicidal or feel like harming yourself or other people:
  • Call 999
  • Go to your nearest Accident and Emergency department (A&E)

Be proud of yourself:

Moving away is so hard, and using healthy coping mechanisms instead of unhealthy ones is something to be very proud of! I'm only just starting to feel proud of myself for feeding myself and looking after myself, and knowing when I need a break. You'll get the hang of it!


Thats all from me for today, 

Sending love and good vibes,

Matilda x

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